Why I Filmed My Abortion? A Response: Part 2

To see the video and the first part of this response, visit here.


“I feel in awe of the fact that I can make a baby. I can make a life.”

I read the Cosmo article that Emily Letts wrote about this whole thing. That’s where the title of this series comes from. In it, she talks about how she was introduced to abortion.

She became friends with a birth doula. Her friendship with the doula introduced her to the miracle of childbirth. In her own words, she became a “birth junkie.” She trained to be a doula. As part of her training, she learned that there are three kinds of doulas: birth doulas, adoption doulas, and abortion doulas.

She says:

“I had never been political about abortion rights before, but the idea of helping women through an abortion and supporting them and reassuring them that they are still wonderful and beautiful resonated deeply with me.

I would agree with her. Women who are suffering the most, women who need to show courage the most, need to be reassured of their value. It is a beautiful and meaningful job to stand by someone who is struggling. That is the reason I trained to be a hospital chaplain.

However, there is nothing beautiful about abortion. That doesn’t mean that the woman who leaves the clinic is any less valuable than the woman who walked in. But death isn’t beautiful. It’s never beautiful.

She writes:

I knew the cameras were in the room during the procedure, but I forgot about them almost immediately. I was focused on staying positive and feeling the love from everyone in the room. I am so lucky that I knew everyone involved, and I was so supported. I remember breathing and humming through it like I was giving birth. I know that sounds weird, but to me, this was as birth-like as it could be. It will always be a special memory for me. I still have my sonogram, and if my apartment were to catch fire, it would be the first thing I’d grab. (Emphasis is mine)

She kept the sonogram. Let me repeat that: She kept the sonogram. Did that sink in?

Once again, she’s right. It is freaking amazing what a woman’s body is capable of.


Birth is beautiful. What happened in that room, however, was not birth. Birth is the first step in a life-long journey. It is the welcoming of a daily challenge and an eternal relationship between mother and child. This reminds me, however, of a quote that is frequently said in birth activist circles:


Is it possible that, although the child was here only for 2 or 3 weeks, when that child was aborted, a mother was born? As Elizabeth Scalia points out, did microchimerism already occur? In some bizarre way, did she become a mother?

Being a mother changes everything. Perhaps it will change her views someday.

Tomorrow, I will go into part 3 of my reflection where I look at her next couple sentences, “I knew that what I was going to do is right. It was right for me and no one else.”



2 thoughts on “Why I Filmed My Abortion? A Response: Part 2

  1. Pingback: Why I Filmed My Abortion? A Response: Part 3 | The True Dignity of Women

  2. Pingback: Why I Filmed My Abortion? A Response: Part 4 | The True Dignity of Women

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